Thirty for 30

I'm turning 30 on November 23rd so I thought it would be fun to make a completely random list of 30 things on my mind right now. It's a mix of things about me and about life...but mostly it's about me! It is my birthday, after all.

Hope you enjoy!

1. I don't have flawless skin. I likely never will and I'm okay with that!
2. Treat everyone you meet (even total strangers) the way you want to be treated.
3. I have just figured out what I want to be when I grow up.
4. Moisturize, moisturize, moisturize! Even if you think it will make you breakout even more, MOISTURIZE.
5. Don't apologize for upsetting someone with your opinion.
6. I don't wash my hair everyday. Sometimes I even go 3 days in between washings. It's done wonders for my hair! It's longer and healthier than it's ever been.
7. I often give myself a hard time because I don't have a lot of friends. I have a handful of close friends I know I can count on and that's good enough for me.
8. Along with # 7, a lot of people don't know that I am painfully shy and awkward around new people. I always seem to say totally random things that make no sense. This makes me clam up and seem unapproachable.
9. I so wish I was more creative/crafty!
10. For the last 2 years, I've made the New Years Resolution to take more pictures of my family and friends. I still haven't accomplished it. Here's to next year!
11. I finally have a smart phone!
12. As I've gotten older, I've come to realize the importance of giving to those less fortunate than me. I hope to teach my children to be giving people
13. Don't ever ask me anything geography related. The answer will be "I don't know." True story: While looking at a map, I once asked my husband what country is connected to the left side of Canada. Answer: Alaska. See? Don't ask me about geography. And yes, I do know Alaska is not a country.
14. I love having long-ish hair but I have no idea how to style it.
15. I recently gave up caffeine...willingly.
16. I have a twelve year old cat. She's a total bitch but I love her.
17. New Girl is the funniest show ever.
18. Dry brushing your body feels amazing. And the Internet tells me it helps get rid of cellulite. Hallelujah!
19. I really don't like to just sit and watch TV or a movie. I would much rather do something productive with my time.
20. I'm not very good at standing up for myself. But that doesn't mean I let people walk all over me.
21. I absolutely love fall! Pumpkins, leaves, Thanksgiving, cooler weather. I love all of it!
22. I love the Christmas season, too. Notice I didn't say winter. As far as I'm concerned, once Christmas over it should be spring!
23. When my children are grown, I will fully support their decision to live with their significant others before marriage. It's my opinion that you have to learn to live with someone before adding the pressure of marriage into the mix.
24. Colin has reached the age where he's asking a million questions about everything. It's the best! It makes me so happy that he is so eager to learn. It makes my heart burst when I hear him repeat something I've taught him.
25. I can't say I love being a working mom because honestly, it's the hardest thing I've ever had to do. But I am so thankful for the daycare provider we found. She is amazing; so kind and patient. She's definitely a role model for me.
26. Coconut oil has single handedly changed my skin - for the better! I will never use conventional lotion again.
27. I clean my vacuum after I use it. Every time.
28. We have  3 animals: 2 dogs, 1 cat. While I mostly love them, I have declared to never have another pet after these 3 pass. No. More. Fur! My sanity cannot take it. Mark has joked that one day he'll just come home with a puppy and I swear I almost lost it on him.
29. I love looking at home decorating magazines. It's done nothing for my sense of style.
30. While turning 30 is a little hard to swallow, I'm honestly excited to see what the next decade has in store for me and my family.

That's it! Hopefully you learned something about me and maybe had a good laugh :)

Turning 30 and lots of planning

So I'm turning 30 on November 23rd.

I'm totally at peace with it. My twenties were great: I graduated college, bought a house, got married, had a baby. But I'm honestly looking forward to my thirties. I'm excited to watch our family grow and to see what is in store for us.

But the truth is my birthday is completely overshadowed by Baby Testa # 2.

We're planning to start trying in November.

Gulp.

Getting pregnant is the easy part. Planning to get the type of delivery I want and deserve is the hard part. And it shouldn't be that way in this country. But that's another post for another day.

I had a C-section with Colin so now I not only have to find a doctor and hospital who support my choice to attempt a VBAC, I also have to take extra steps in order to ensure my body is capable. I know, I know. Every woman's body is capable. But I have to prepare for the reality that mine might not be. I mean, Colin was only 5 pounds and his head got stuck in my pelvis...who knows if that will happen again.

For the better part of July I spent the majority of my free time researching chiropractors, acupuncturists, OB GYN's, hospitals and insurance coverage. It has been frightening, enraging...and enlightening. I have learned so much and I've become really passionate about this topic.

I have finally located a group practice that supports VBAC's. I also found a local doctor who specializes in chiropractic care and acupuncture for pregnant women. Both of these have been proven to prepare the body for labor. I'm planning to make appointments with both very soon - I want to have the majority of the "kinks" worked out before baby is on board. I figure since I've still got time I shouldn't waste it.

So there it is. I've had a lot going on lately. I'm not preoccupied with turning 30 with all of this on my mind!

A perfect weekend

We had the best weekend we've had in a while. The weather was finally beautiful and the toddler screaming sessions were, thankfully, minimal. Let me tell you, my mama heart needed a weekend like this. Colin is two and a half years old and he acts it. Most days his forms of communication are screams and demands. There's only so much of that I can take! To have two entire days where he was calm and back to the happy, sweet boy I know was AH-MAZING.

I never want to forget...

Playing in the fountain at Menard's while waiting for daddy.

Incessant giggles at lunch.

Family soccer games.

Three hour naps.

Random sayings of "love you, buddy mama."

Building a Lego tower that was taller than daddy and then knocking it over.

The entire weekend just gave me hope. The last few months have been very tough on me as a parent. Colin wants nothing to do with his dad. He wants me to do everything for him and if I don't or if Mark tries to help him, it sets him off into a major tantrum. He has screamed in my face, smacked me, kicked me. It's tough to keep calm in those types of situations. I hate being the mom who yells back but sometimes, I don't know what else to do.

The best parenting advice I was ever given was "Think of every stage as a season. It will soon pass." This saying has helped me tremendously recently. This past weekend felt like the first warm spring day after a bitter cold winter. It gave me something to look forward to. It gave me a sense that all of the tantrums and scream sessions will soon be behind us.

And I can't frickin' wait!

Talking to children about tragedy

I follow Parents magazine on Facebook and after Monday's horrific events in Boston, they posted (a version of) this question: How do/would you talk to your children about a tragedy like this?

It got me thinking. Being a parent, at some point I'm going to have to answer the "Why?" questions my children will have. And I want to be prepared. I thought about it on my way home from work and the first thing I decided is that I will not solicit questions from them. I want to let them come to me with their questions about these types of situations. If it doesn't directly affect them, I find it unnecessary to bring it into their little world.

That being said, I know one day they will come to me and ask why people do bad things to other people. I want them to know I don't have the answer to that question. The only person who can answer it is the person doing the bad things. And even if that person gives a reason, it's likely no one else will understand.

People who do good, do it quietly. People who do bad, do it loudly for all to see. This is why the good doesn't make the news headlines every day.

For every bad guy, there are 10 good guys. I noticed in the pictures of Boston how many people were rushing to the scene, not away from it. That gave me comfort and I want my children to look for the good in every situation. As my favorite saying goes: Believe there is good in the world. Be the good.

Help. If any of my children are put in a situation like what happened in Boston and they are not hurt but others around them are, I want them to stay and help (obviously only if their life isn't in danger by staying). Sit with a victim and talk to them. Tell them help is coming. Hug them. Hold their hand. Give them comfort. Get them somewhere they can receive medical attention. DO ANYTHING. Even the smallest act of kindness means the world to someone who is hurt.

 Most importantly, I don't want my children to live in fear of the world or of others.

So...

My mom was recently diagnosed with late onset progressive Multiple Sclerosis (MS). I have no idea if that's the correct name but that's what it is. It's a diagnosis she ultimately knew was coming but it wasn't until recently that her doctor confirmed she's suffering from MS.

MS is not considered to be hereditary (thank goodness) but "the risk of acquiring MS is higher in relatives of a person with the disease than in the general population, especially in the case of siblings, parents, and children." Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Multiple_sclerosis

Yikes. Along with family history, the other major risk factors are age and gender. Per Mayo Clinic:

Age. Multiple sclerosis can occur at any age, but most commonly affects people who are ages 20 to 40.

Gender. Women are about twice as likely as men to develop multiple sclerosis.

Check and check. Double yikes.

Can I be honest? All of this scares me. A lot. It's not easy to watch my mom's condition deteriorate so quickly. But then to also think I (or my brothers) could have the same fate is incomprehensible.

I've been doing a lot of research on MS recently. Mainly I wanted to know what the warning signs are. If I ever have any of them, I am high tailing it a doctor STAT.

I don't want to live my life like I already have MS but I have to live like it's an option.

I have to be more aware of what's going on with my body.

I have to be more aware of how I take care of myself.

It's scary and kind of daunting to think about having to be "on alert". But I just continue to keep up on the latest research and make changes as needed to hopefully, lower my risk.

Colin updates!

I feel like Colin is changing so much every day. It makes my heart burst with pride and also makes me a little sad. Time goes by way too fast and I wish I could keep him little forever. Okay, not really forever but you know what I mean!

His language skills are rocking my world. We're able to actually hold short conversations with him now and it's so much easier for him to tell us what he needs.

Two quick stories:

1. He has an Elmo movie, "Elmo Goes to Grouchland" which he loves - I think because he can relate to Elmo. Elmo has a blue blanket just like Colin has a beloved blue blanket. Elmo loses the blanket and has to go to Grouchland to get it back. Every. Single. Time. we watch the movie, Colin gets so upset when Elmo loses his blanket and tonight he said to me as I was tucking him into bed "Me no lose blankie like Elmo". I'm such a softy...it brought tears to my eyes! I just love when he makes connections with things like that.

2. We had our first repeated cuss word experience recently. I was getting the house ready for my parents 40th wedding anniversary party and the cat was on the table eating the plastic banner. I said "Get off the table or I'm going to spank your ass". I thought I said it under my breath so little ears wouldn't hear but Colin followed it up by yelling "ASS!" Definitely not my proudest moment. I tried not to make a huge deal out of it because I don't want him to know he's not supposed to say that word. I mean, he's two. He's always pushing boundaries and I don't need to give him one more to push. Mark and I are definitely more careful with our language now!

Colin is such a great helper. He loves to help cook and do small chores around the house. His babysitter is always mentioning how good he does at picking up after himself the first time she asks. He loves to help the babies at daycare, too. He's just such a kind boy. He's got great manners, always saying "please" and "thank you".

I feel like I'm missing so much! I need to get a notebook and start writing things down so I don't forget!

Meal Planning

We've been doing our meal planning for about 2 months now and it's going so well. Since we actually stuck to it, I figured I'd give you an update!

When I last wrote about meal planning, I mentioned I was using the program Plan To Eat. But I stopped using this program after my 30 day trial. The only reason I quit is because I didn't want to pay for a service. I found a free app on my Kindle called "Pepper Plate". I love it. I can update it on my laptop and it automatically syncs to my Kindle. Quick and easy!

One of my biggest worries with meal planning was that we wouldn't be able to afford to try new recipes since we have a pretty strict budget of $75/week. I have been pleasantly surprised because we have been able to try at least one new recipe each week. Sometimes it's more. Sometimes we can only afford to get half of the ingredients and then have to get the rest the next week. We've made trying new recipes a priority and honestly, it's become a fun bonding time for us to sit down together and pick out a recipe to try.

Meal planning has done wonders for our bank account, too. We're excited about cooking at home so we rarely dine out. We really only go out to eat once a week (or more if we're invited out by friends!)

We started out kind of rigid and stuck to the menu to the letter. That got difficult because you just never know how a night is going to go with a toddler. If he doesn't have the patience to wait an hour for dinner to cook, I switch it up and make something quicker, saving the longer recipes for the weekend. Then there are also weeks where the entire house gets the stomach flu and we don't eat a thing in the refrigerator. Flexibility is key!

All in all, meal planning will definitely be something we're going to stick with. Now that cleaning schedule I also wrote about in the past? That hasn't fared so well ;)

More Colin-isms

I haven't blogged about Colin in a while so here ya go!

• He's still ob.sessed with movies. Like every single morning and evening it's the first thing he asks for. No, we don't let him watch one that often. He typically has to "earn" it by being patient in the evening while dinner is cooking and he has to take at least 1 bite of something off his dinner plate.
• As much as he loves his movies, he still very much enjoys books. Before we put a movie on, we encourage him to read books with us. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.
• He pretty much refuses to eat anything but fruit, bread, and cheese so after he takes his one bite of food off his dinner plate, we give him something we know he'll eat just so he'll have a full belly and sleep better.
• Speaking of sleeping, he's doing fantastic with his big boy bed. Some nights he does fall out (he sleeps like me - all over the place!) but he either gets back in bed himself or we go in and lay him back down. It's been GLORIOUS to have our bed back. Don't get me wrong, I love the extra togetherness co-sleeping gives us but it's hard sleeping with a toddler who moves constantly.
• Colin knows the alphabet and can count to 15. He counts higher if someone counts with him but on his own he can get to 15 and only misses a number or two - which I think is pretty impressive!
• One funny story I wanted to share: Colin was pushing around this toy bus he has and ran in to Mark's feet. Mark said "Ow! That hurts. You need to be careful!". Colin looked up at him and said "beep beep". I know I shouldn't have laughed but come on! It was too well timed not to.
• Colin's vocabulary is growing every day. He's really trying hard to say new words and mimics almost everything we say.
• We're beginning to potty train. We're still in the very early stages...no underwear or pull ups just yet. We're just taking our time right now and focusing on getting him accustomed to the routine.

More adjustments

So when I dubbed 2013 "The Year of Adjustments", I wasn't quite prepared for how fast adjustments would be needed in our daily life.

The first big adjustment we made was putting Colin in a "big boy bed". The quotations are needed because it's still his crib, just with the front rail removed. Thus making it a day bed. I'll admit - I was no where near ready for this. But after a very rough night that involved lots of screaming "HELP ME MAMA!" and one failed escape attempt too many (complete with bruised knees from getting his legs stuck between the bars), we decided it was safer to just make the change.

So last Friday night the rail came down. We chose Friday for the simple fact that Mark and I could nap on Saturday and Sunday if Colin refused to sleep because let's be honest, that's what we expected. But thank heavens, he did great! He was actually very excited to be able to get in and out of his bed on his own. But once he's in bed, he usually stays there. I think he only got up once to grab a different book. AMAZING. I think we bored him to sleep because we removed all distracting toys from his room, leaving only books and stuffed animals. We're so sneaky.

The next adjustment was our morning routine. We had a good thing going where Mark and Colin would watch sports/eat breakfast (yes, normally he ate his cereal bar in our bed...it works worked for us) while I showered and got ready. Then I would get Colin dressed and we'd head downstairs. I'm not sure what happened but all of the sudden, this was no longer copacetic with Colin. Almost every morning last week he would just stand in the bathroom and scream "DOWN!" at me. Then he would get even more pissed when I'd say "We can't go downstairs yet, we're not dressed". He wanted nothing to do with sports or breakfast. He just wanted to follow the dang cat downstairs.

This morning we started a new routine: I get up early, workout if there's time, shower and get ready. Once Colin is up, Mark gets him ready and then sends him downstairs to me. This morning almost went off without a hitch except...I over slept so I wasn't quite ready when Colin came downstairs. He only cried a little and was stoked to be with his dogs and cat. I think I'm the one doing the most adjusting to this new routine. I try to get as much ready at night as I can (like breakfasts, lunches, and outfits) and then I get up almost an hour earlier than normal. That's the hardest thing to get used to!

I was at the point where I would have done anything to make things easier and less stressful on all of us. Getting up early is a small price to pay!

2013: The Year of Adjustments

Well...2013 is upon us. Which means at point in the next 11 months, Mark and I will start trying to expand our family.

::throws confetti::

We're both semi-ready and crazy excited. Colin can be difficult to handle and deal with at times, so often the thought of adding a newborn to the mix is more than we think we're ready to handle. Nonetheless, we still definitely want to expand our family.

Mark and I agreed to use the time before Baby Testa # 2 arrives to get ourselves on track for the life we want to have. Meaning we will be working towards me becoming a stay at home mom. I wish with all my heart we could have done this after Colin was born. I've never really liked being a working mom. The only way I can describe how I feel about the SAHM vs. Working Mom dilemma is by saying imagine the one job you want more than anything in the world. Now imagine being told you can't have that job, not because you lack the skills, but because it doesn't pay enough. You have to miss out on your dreams because of a paycheck.

Totally not fair.

But that's life.

On the other hand, I feel so blessed that we found an amazing daycare (and friends) for Colin and that my husband also wants me to stay home with baby # 2. It's nice when our goals match!

We have steadily been working toward paying down debts like a small car loan and student loans. We're very careful to not take on new debt by limiting what we put on our credit cards and eliminating unnecessary expenses (like magazine subscriptions).

For me, 2013 is going to be about adjusting myself into the role of SAHM. I will soon be transitioning to a life that is completely different from the one I'm used to. Since our house and family are about to become my full time job, I need to do all I can to make the transition as smooth as possible. And, let's be honest here, I prefer to have a schedule so I've started meal planning and I created a weekly cleaning schedule. These are just small steps that I hope will help me adjust to my new role with ease.

Here's to 2013. I can't wait to see what the year has in store for us!

Meal planning

I've decided I need to shake things up and make my life just a little more exciting. Don't get me wrong - I love my life. I just need something to focus on and actually put some thought in to. A project, if you will.

So, being the Wanna Be Housewife that I am...I decided to start a meal plan. I really know how to spice things up ;)

I'll be honest and tell you I don't put a lot of thought into meals during the week. Our rotation of dinners is almost always chicken with veggies, steak with veggies, pork with veggies. BORING. I should also come clean and tell you I don't do the grocery shopping. Or the list making. Nope, that's all my husband. He's got a system he uses for budgeting so I just let him handle it. Which probably explains why our meals are so mundane: he's no chef.

I talked to him about changing things up and we agreed that from now on, we'll split the task. I'll do the planning and list making. He'll do the shopping and budgeting. I have to say, I love that it's a joint venture.

Anyway, I found this website called Plan To Eat (www.plantoeat.com). This is the best website I've found. They offer a 30 day free trial of their service with no strings attached. The website lets you add recipes (you can even import them from websites), then you can add them to your meal plan and it automatically adds all the ingredients from the recipe to your shopping list. Of course, you can add your own ingredients and customize it to suit your needs. It's really very cool. You should check it out.

I just started yesterday but I'm having so much fun. It's refreshing to be putting actual (healthy) meals on the table for my family.

It also makes me feel like a better wife when I tell my husband what's for dinner instead of him telling me!